I'm sorry you didn't get to go this year. And really, I think this is a case where it's a little bit of everything: money, illness, just plain not wanting to go out. It's hard when you're already struggling with something and you're given even more reasons not to do it. The more of those reasons that pile up, the more apt you are to say, "screw it." I know that quite well. I find myself more and more often making the choice to stay in when I could go out, and the reasons for that really are a long list, one of them regarding my mental state, I admit. So give yourself the benefit of the doubt! You do go out, and for someone who has agoraphobia, I'd say you manage quite well. *hugs*