Hey, l'il sistah!!! So, when do ya turn 30, hmmmm? One does start rethinking a lot of shit when they hit 30 and then again around 40; we change so much. Shoot, I didn't even start this fandom stuff until I was almost 40, a midlife crisis is how I explain it. I do so agree with you about the possibly unhealthy side effects of getting too obsessed. It can take over a large segment of one's life. But I still say that some fantasy is so healthy and necessary for us women, as long as it is kept at a healthy level.
I haven't had that many crushes. Elvis when I was a kid, big time! Paul Newman forever, but I don't fantasize about him for some reason. Before Hornblower I went through a Val Kilmer phase, watched all his movies, and fantasized, the whole nine yards, though I never checked him out online or wanted to meet him. Then there was Hornblower and Ioan and Robert. I enjoyed fantasies about both of them, individually and together, snort! I collected their stuff but again, didn't read a whole lot about their real lives. I remember thinking some unflattering thoughts about people who got so obsessed with Bamber and wanted to meet him. Not unflattering so much, as thinking it was a little too obsessive to meet and give gifts and all that. But then, there I went and did the same thing with the McGann. That one did go a smidgeon over healthy fantasy I think, learning too much about the real life, becoming emotionally invested, and then disappointed when I found out he was actually a lizard. I'm over it now, but it did cause some distress, more than it should have. But I did learn my lesson.
Now, I'm back to shallowly enjoying and fantasizing from a distance, a great distance, which makes me a very happy fangirl.
My current crush is Jamie Fraser, a book character, not an actor, and he has yet to be portrayed by any actor, so I feel pretty safe.
I honestly feel that some starcrushing is a-okay and healthy, and that it can create an escape of sorts for people. The level one immerses themself in that escape is the important thing, because it can go overboard and interfere. McGann and all the traveling I did for a few years there, 2003-2005, provided a much needed escape for me at a time when I was adjusting to my son having left the nest. I needed it, but still, it was an escape and I admit that. But now I'm not feeling as needy, and as a result, I'm not into the fandom thingie quite so much at the moment. Because I'm enjoying my real life more. So, I maintain that fandom is a type of escape for people. Whether it stays a healthy escape or strays into the rhealm of unhealthy is up to the individual I suppose.
I'm glad I broke away from my McGann crush, because I feel healthier, less obsessed, and happier with me now. But I'm not saying that's the way it has to be with others; that's just my own experience.
Love ya girl and thanks for the thoughts, ya philosophical thing you. One more thing I will say about aging - as I get older I become less and less worried about what others think, and I say what I think. If folks don't like it they can lump it. So, while I do have pretty strong thoughts about some people being too obsessed with actors and the media, I am not afraid to say that I love looking at the naked male body because it is a thing of beauty and I will continue to do so proudly!!!
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I haven't had that many crushes. Elvis when I was a kid, big time! Paul Newman forever, but I don't fantasize about him for some reason. Before Hornblower I went through a Val Kilmer phase, watched all his movies, and fantasized, the whole nine yards, though I never checked him out online or wanted to meet him. Then there was Hornblower and Ioan and Robert. I enjoyed fantasies about both of them, individually and together, snort! I collected their stuff but again, didn't read a whole lot about their real lives. I remember thinking some unflattering thoughts about people who got so obsessed with Bamber and wanted to meet him. Not unflattering so much, as thinking it was a little too obsessive to meet and give gifts and all that. But then, there I went and did the same thing with the McGann. That one did go a smidgeon over healthy fantasy I think, learning too much about the real life, becoming emotionally invested, and then disappointed when I found out he was actually a lizard. I'm over it now, but it did cause some distress, more than it should have. But I did learn my lesson.
Now, I'm back to shallowly enjoying and fantasizing from a distance, a great distance, which makes me a very happy fangirl.
My current crush is Jamie Fraser, a book character, not an actor, and he has yet to be portrayed by any actor, so I feel pretty safe.
I honestly feel that some starcrushing is a-okay and healthy, and that it can create an escape of sorts for people. The level one immerses themself in that escape is the important thing, because it can go overboard and interfere. McGann and all the traveling I did for a few years there, 2003-2005, provided a much needed escape for me at a time when I was adjusting to my son having left the nest. I needed it, but still, it was an escape and I admit that. But now I'm not feeling as needy, and as a result, I'm not into the fandom thingie quite so much at the moment. Because I'm enjoying my real life more. So, I maintain that fandom is a type of escape for people. Whether it stays a healthy escape or strays into the rhealm of unhealthy is up to the individual I suppose.
I'm glad I broke away from my McGann crush, because I feel healthier, less obsessed, and happier with me now. But I'm not saying that's the way it has to be with others; that's just my own experience.
Love ya girl and thanks for the thoughts, ya philosophical thing you. One more thing I will say about aging - as I get older I become less and less worried about what others think, and I say what I think. If folks don't like it they can lump it. So, while I do have pretty strong thoughts about some people being too obsessed with actors and the media, I am not afraid to say that I love looking at the naked male body because it is a thing of beauty and I will continue to do so proudly!!!
squeezes and smooches