The Magical Tale (Tail?!) of Porn Dog!

The funniest thing happened one of the first nights after we had moved in when Ann (my sister and roomie) was walking the dogs! You see, we're very private, protected from the lookie-loos... from the front of the house, at least. The back is this one long stretch of grass and at night with all the lights on, you can see directly into other people's den's from their porch and dining room windows. So, Ann rushes back and says to me, you know, something like, 'Oh my God, come quick! I wonder if it's still there!' and rushes me out the door. We walk to the end of our building and this dude on the end has a hardcore porno projecting onto the large dining room wall! You can see it, like, a mile away! I swear it was the funniest thing!!! Ann: "God, his cock is huge but it looks like it's four feet on that thing!" Bwahahahah!

The same people leave a doggie out on a lead during the day (I suppose while they're at work) and Ann has dubbed him the 'porn dog,' bwahahahahaha! She says she hopes he's not involved in any "extra-curicular activities!"

Okay, so a couple of nights later, my sister met Mr. Porn! Our dogs love his little doggy (Buster, we found out yesterday) who he keeps out on a lead during the day, and always run to his house to see if he's out there. Well, that night, Billy (that's Mr. Porn's name! LOL!) saw her, thought she was a stray and let her into his house! She was running around like mad with my sister running after her waving her arms! She ran all throughout his house, every room, while Ann explained to him what had happened!

He's really... eccentric... but not in a serial killer type of way or anything! Ann said he's like Christopher Eccleston as Doctor Who, with all of his manic energy (which he's taking Paxil for, he gladly shared with her; I think he needs to up his dosage! ;-)) She also said his house is really weird, with a bunch of couches, rugs and quite a few of those big exercise balls! Don't really want to know what he uses them for!

The strangest thing is -if you can qualify just one thing from the whole experience- we always make fun of the fact that there's never a guard at the gatehouse when we pass it and assumed that was there for show. BUT, the guard was actually hanging out with Billy last night; they had been in the hot tub together before going back to his place and finding May! Strange, strange things are happening, I tell ya! ;-)

And if that don't warm the cockles of yer heart for the holidays, I don't know what will! Ha!

Peace, Ghani