Weapons of Class Destruction

So... I've been sort of absent lately, and that's mostly because I've just felt sort of blah lately, between the heat and just general anxiety issues. Went to get my hair cut last Friday; my sister's regular hairdresser was snotty to her and I ended up with just some random woman who... really didn't seem to know what she was doing. Needless to say, it doesn't look great (which is why no pictures, when you got such lovely ones of me back in December!)

I also realized that I've basically lost all of that built up immunity I've had for going out in public, which is depressing, honestly. I used to go on trips to see my friends and do a modest amount of shopping. Sighs. I suppose, when things even out again with both mine and my sister's lives, I can start the process of building it up again, but... there it is, le sigh.

Shutter Island: A Short Review - ( Spoilers )

Night at The Museum 2: An Even Shorter Review - Hank Azaria, I love you! Greek kick-ass power! The movie was cute, though I'm not sure why the filmmakers thought kids'd be so captivated by the romance between Larry and Amelia Earhart. A nice way to spend a couple of hours, not outstanding but pleasant.

Alice in Wonderland - You Guessed It, A short Review - Loved it. Was surprised at how much I loved it, even though everyone I know recommended it. I adore Mia Wasikowska. Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter was excellent!

Haven't gotten out to see any of the summer movies (see: above). Was hoping to see Prince of Persia or A-Team (my childhood demanded it!), but it didn't happen. Last Air Bender is still on the horizon and of course Harry Potter!

True Blood 3x01: ( spoilers )

Doctor Who: Love, love, love the new season. Matt Smith, you are a wonder! And to think I ever doubted you or Karen Gillan! It took a bit for the season to get going, in my opinion, but it's been absolutely divine since "Time of the Angels"! Oh and River Song! I could not love you more, though I already do from what I knew of you in last season, and I'd thought that was impossible back then!

Peace, Ghani

So, my sister had a dinner to go to tonight, which meant I was able to watch Lancelot and Guinevere much sooner than I'd thought, hooray! And since it was the pure awesomeness I was hoping it was going to be, I just had to write a review!

( Spoilers for 2x04--duh! )

Peace, Ghani

Homer: Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people.
Lisa: What about Abraham Lincoln?
Homer: He sold poison milk to school children.
Marge: Homer!
-The Simpsons

Okay, so I adore anthology show Masters of Horror. Not only does it showcase new and upcoming talent in the genre (who aren't Eli Roth, my nemisis), but it gives a chance to those who have worked pretty thanklessly for years. I don't think I've ever sat through one I didn't enjoy on some level. Erm, until last night that is. Actually, I was really enjoying the first half, but then realized where it was all going, and at a snail's pace as well, and not only felt dissatisfied, but rather alarmed by its message.

It's not unusual to find political satire in horror; hell, like sci-fi, it seems ripe for it. I've seen quite a few on Masters of Horror itself, such as the amazing, surprisingly touching and sharp Homecoming, so when my sister turned it on last night and the opening scene involved the lead characters listening to a political talk show on the radio, I knew what I was in for. Or thought I did at least.

It got progressively stranger from there. The parents of a ten year old daughter don't think it's odd or creepy at all that an older gent, who is behaving so strangely I'd have a hard time not laughing in his face, offer the kid a lollipop of his favorite flavor, cherry. Um, yeah. Wjat they do find creepy and odd is a portrait of George Washington in their deceased granny's basement. Yup, folks Washington. George. The. The little girl screams when she catched sight of a beam of light only highlighting his eyes and the father proclaims that he was always scared of the painting. Yup, George Washington, the very same historical favorite who could ruin any Ouji reading at any happening slumber party just by his presence via the board; he's just not scary!

Well, it was called The Washiontonians and did have a Headless Horseman-esque opening sequence in which a Revolutionary figure stalks and cuts a woman's head off, so we decided to wait and see. Where was this all going? Down the crapper, it turned out. You see, Washington, according to this story, was a cannibal. Remember the cherry tree? Well, that was a metaphor for virginity, and cutting down the cherry tree equated in eating the flesh of a virgin. seriously, folks, I couldn't make this up if I tried. and I wouldn't want to.

You see, in the end, our lesson was that people want to believe the myth of history, it's what survives, and some would go to any length to conceal "the truth" (used in the same vague manner as it was on X-Files, where they threw around the term weekly without ever defining just what they expected it to be). In a none too suble allegory (with emphasis on the gory), we're shown that governments are cruel cannibalistic monsters who eat the people they serve and turn inward on themselves. At the very end, we're told that "one George was swapped for another", and we're shown a dollar bill with Dubbya's face proudly smiling back at us as the characters comically all exclaim, 'No shit!'

I got over the idea that history was written by the winners when I was in my teens; after all, if that were true, what would we know about Auschwitz, Wounded Knee, or Billy the Kid? What my sister said after watching it was true: History sorts itself out; it's the present people are usually blind to. But, more than that, the paranoia of governmental mistrust runs so deeply throughout the story, it scared me. The end comes as the cannibals are gunned down by "the men who could cover up anything", like Roswell, we're told. The kindly professor who was in search of that elusive "the truth" tells our intrepid hero to get the word out, no matter what. I mean, the whole thing is fucking insane!

And it's offensive. Trust me, I'm not the model of a flag waving partior these days, but I do respect our history and the men who had the vision to set us all on a new course in life. While they refer to Washington's image as that of a "kindly old gentleman" in the show, I've always thought of him as the spirit of youthful, idealistic exuberance, just like our own country back in those days. How, in any way, their situation echoes our present day conundrum completely eludes me, to compare the war in Iraq with the Revoltuion is hilariously offbase and plain bizzare, to compare the respective leaders is worse.

And I have to wonder just how they thought history could be hidden quite so well when we know more about them than we really should do via letters (and don't tell me Adams was in any way involved in any of this because, for Gawd's sake, it's Adams!); our attempt to "humanize" them stripping them of a kind of pleasant mystique we've kept to.

And what's with Washington's fake teeth? Do people really find them ominous and terrifying? There's such a strange focus on the grotesqueness of his dentures, with close-ups of the cannibals mock pairs and one even having an almost orgasmic reaction to the originals. Are people really scared of this shit?! Is this, like, some rational fear that other people have and we just don't know about it?! My grandmother wore dentures and, aside from the contant click-clack that could get on one's nerves, I wasn't ever really mortally terrified of them. And the thing with the wood- it's old, guys! We know from historic texts that they didn't look bad! Well, why would they? He was rich, he was famous, would he really have disguting dentures? Think about it. Or, please don't, actually.

I know it's just a fantasy, but who would write this stuff, who would believe this is an accurate analogy?! I always knew the complete whackjobs were out there, I just never realized that someone who was as seemingly intelligent as to get his works published would be on the level of men who wear tinfoil hats so the CIA can't read their thoughts.

Peace, Ghani

Okay, so despite all of the absolutely glowing reviews fans who went to the screenings gave it, I still had my reservations about Serenity, I admit it! A few well-placed, or in this case, badly-placed, spoilers plus an iffy advertising campaign had me kinda lukewarm on this one. Had Joss really dropped the ball the badly? In a word: NO! The movie is brilliant, so much more than I could have ever expected.

( Wo de ma he ta de feng-kuang de wai-sheng dou! BIG DAMN SPOILERS ahead in the fake cut... )

Great show, fantastic f/x and it sheds that touchy/feely Sixth Sense crap about helping the poor, evil spirits. Dean's set up in his car is one of the most wicked things I've seen in a while and the whole thing with him, at least, reminded me of early Buffy. And then there's Jared Padalecki. Not a fan. He plays boring and annoying too well. Which actually leads me to the main point of this post: Why the heck have heroes gotten so damned boring?!

Where and when did the idea come from in Hollywood that viewers, especially of fantasy and/or sci-fi, want to be the ordinary (read: boring, nagging, whinging etc.) one who doesn't want anything to do with the crazy doings around them? Right because I can escape my life enough without having a main character who whines that he's gonna miss his law school interview because he's out doing cool things, busting kick-ass ghosts, etc. Yeah, I can really identify with that. And that is SO sarcasm!

In creating Luke Skywalker, Lucas reinvented the reluctant hero, living in their backwaters part of the world, cautious to leave behind what they've always known and the people they love but ultimately accepting their destiny with grace, poise and dignity. Apparently, Hollywood has deemed this too old fashioned and created the new hero for us: the unlikable wretch. Han Solo has gained much more prestige as a hero mainly because of his anti-hero stance which seems odd because he himself steps up to it and becomes a hero beyond what he ever thought of himself capable of. Which leads me into...

Dune began a change with Dune Messiah and Children of Dune dealing with the fallout of becoming the uber-messiah but also introduced us to a hero who was more than his father could ever be, who could accept his fate with the strength his father never showed. Leto II became more than himself because he let himself be. This is postive; so when did we start going backwards?

Fast forward to 1997 to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, a new hero for a new generation. Though she accepted her destiny with more reluctance than Luke, she still realized what it entailed and was surrounded by friends like Willow and Xander whose own lives were so uninteresting that they, like the viewer, were instantly sucked into that world. But Buffy itself changed as the years went on, to the point when the producers no longer understood that viewers were identifying with her because, although there were some major downsides to the whole chosen one thing, she was special. She was an ordinary girl who found she was extraordinary, one in a million. The same phenomenon is what keeps the Harry Potter gravy train rolling so why don't more producers understand that it's that factor that makes it appealing?

And here comes the new series of Doctor Who where Russell T Davies seems utterly convinced that there is no way we can identify with the Doctor save for an ordinary, modern day Earth girl, Rose, who has family and pouts a lot. The Doctor, an extraordinary character that boys all over the world wanted for years to emulate because he was special, he was unbelievable, wild, cool, has been sidelined, the neat-o companion watered down to what the production team deems the most identifiable personality. I like Rose a lot but she borders on Professional Mary Sue and I can only hope, when it's time for a change, that Mr. Davies realizes it's really time for a change.

So, my question to you is: would you rather, in a fantasy world, be the guy with the cool car, the weapons, the fake badges and credit cards who chases after ghosts or his dullard brother (who strangely seems to ignore the fact that his mother was stuck to the ceiling, cut in half and burning) that just wants to get on with his life going to law school and being completely, well, ordinary? The latter lacks the wit of a Han Solo or the conviction of a Leto II or even the pain of a Buffy. Why, Hollywood, why?!

Peace, Ghani

He's back... and it's about time! And how many times have we heard that since the Doctor's shaky would-be comeback in 1996? But, truly, what better a way to welcome him than with not just one of the most fantastic debut stories, not just the best (I've seen and I admittedly haven't seen all that have aired in the UK or, well, the rest of the series to come) of the new series, but one of the most solid, enjoyable stories in Who's history.

We start off with a serene view of the Earth from space, a little hint of things to come, and thrust our way straight into the mundane: the every day routine of Rose's life. This is done in a succession of fast cuts some have accused of being strictly for the MTV generation and, while I belong to that group, I felt it was so much more in keeping the pace of the story moving while loading you down with information. We meet Jackie, we meet Mickey. We see her with her friends, we see her working at Henricks department store. We get the impression that this is the ordinary, everyday girl of the 21st century going about her business in the span of moments.

And just as soon as we're catching our collective breath from this peek into modern life, we're thrust into the action, the world of the Doctor as Rose encounters the murderous Autons in the basemnent of Henricks and is rescued in a seat-of-your pants sequence that includes breathless dialogue that an aspiring writer such as myself aches to achieve!

It should be said, right off the bat, that the performance by Billie Piper is superb! Being from the states and therefore not knowing a whole lot about her or her celebrity (about the extent of it was the fact that a friend had her album, Honey to the Bee, for about a week before trading it in), so I came into it without the biases I would have had if she'd been a known figure to me. Whatever expectations I did have for her were completely blown away by the sympathetic, intelligent and completely believable character that she created. Her reactions are completely human, identifiable and I must say, it is nice to see a young attractive woman on the tele who has a real body, not a lollipop on a stick!

And then there's Christopher Eccleston, who I did have very high expectations for indeed as I knew him as an actor and was off my head with excitement when I'd heard he'd been cast! He blew me away. Rarely has a Doctor been so on his game in his debut episode and rarely have I seen Chris act with such giddy enthusiasm for the material. To be fair, rarely has the material so lived up to a new Doctor's performance (Twin Dilemma, Time and the Rani, the TV Movie; I won't go on...), but Rose not only rises to it but uses itself to showcase both of our new main characters!

The Doctor's a strange sort of duck: he moves from his dizzy enthusiasm to dark seriousness in a flash, a bit of a bi-polar there! But that only gives so much more weight to the character, to know that he's not just a grinning idiot, that there's something lurking just beneath the surface. The cut-fast editing only serves to heighten this impression as it moved so quickly from the smrtly written dialogue when Rose is grilling him ("So what you're saying is the entire world revolves around you." "Sort of, yeah." "You're full of it!" "Sort of, yeah!") to the emotive and tremendously moving (no pun intended!) Earth spinning speech!

The humor is superbly handled, with snappy back-and-forths like the one mentioned above, the scene with Jackie in her bedroom, the tussle with a plastic arm in the living room, the Auton Mickey (a fantastic and completely outrageous perfomance by Noel Clarke!)

Complaints have been made about the underscore but I personally took to it: what better way to usher in this fast-paced, snappy story than with a thundering techno beat? It made the editing, which I felt was spot-on, stand out wonderfully and highlighted all the right moments. The effects were wonderfully retro without looking camp or like too much like a wink of the eye to the old series. Where they fell down, frankly, I felt, was where they were trying to look too realistic, like the Nestene Consciousness, which was far from looking awful but kind of had that bad generic CGI feel to it.

Speaking of the ol' Nestene, yes, our friends are back and animating plastic like never before. This is where one of my only gripes comes in: we are told that the Consciousness is animating the mannequins with thought control, so we are to assume that they would be otherwise normal window shop dummies. So where did they get those nifty built in guns? In both Spearhead from Space and Terror of the Autons, we've seen one plastics factory or another infiltrated, pumping out custom made dummies to aid in the Nestenes' plans but that is absent here making it rather, well, a bit of a gaffe. I suppose one can imagine, as the Consciousness has clearly been on eArth sometime, that they've gone through all of this off screen; it's a nitpick that bothered me personally.

That said, the scene where the Autons come to life in the Queen's Arcade is simply stunning and Clive, we hardly knew ye (though I happen to know some spoilers about that website, which has so much promise, of his going to good use in a later episode...) I particularly loved the brides menacing Jackie; a foreshadowing of the episode Father's Day, perhaps?

While the Autons menace however, it seems as if the Consciousness holds onto the Doctor forever, giving no clear indication as to what it actually plans to do with him as Rose makes up her mind to help. Now this I love: a girl actually explaining HOW she can kick butt instead of just doing it because she's a girl and GIRL POWER and Buffy TVS and all that! Her line about her short gymnastics career was one of my favorite of the show as it highlights something I caught onto from the first moment: that we're getting a sense of realism along with out fantasy. I can believe in Rose, I can believe in her abilities!

It is in the lair of the Consciousness we get our first hints about the Time War as well and perhaps even the Doctor going rogue (?) during the mysterious battle ("I was there! I couldn't stop it!").

Rose's enthusiasm to help and sense of fun about it all is also extremely refreshing and contagious, her grin as they run to the Millennium Wheel infectious! Her final moment, the final moment of the show with the remixed theme playing is totally uplifting and a sign of great, great things to come!

Peace, Ghani